this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
