With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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