puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
