my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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