I'm really into asian looking animals
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
