My brain says no but my pants say off.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Randomize
