we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
