I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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