...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Randomize
