No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
