The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Randomize