So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
