(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
