We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
