Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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