How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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