I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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