Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
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