you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
