Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I'm really busy with my period
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