love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
