I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
