I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
