just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
