I'm jealous of your bromance
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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