Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
