i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Randomize
