your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
My vagina is very pro this idea
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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