im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
As shirtless as possible
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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