So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize
