on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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