No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
