Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
