I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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