My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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