forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
