sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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