I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
