sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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