She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
