I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
sarcasm needs its own font
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
