i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
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