From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Randomize
