I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
