They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
