either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I believe in your delicious
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
