Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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