can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
My pussy is not your playground.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
