So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
