hotel room ftw
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
